Thursday, September 23, 2010

Know What Attraction Feels Like to a Woman to Have a Truly Great Relationship or Marriage

A woman writes to describe how overwhelming her feelings of attraction are. It’s a real eye-opener!

I don’t know how things are in your neck of the woods, but where I am, you couldn’t ask for more beautiful weather, at least when the occasional momentary thunderstorm isn’t dumping a quick deluge on my cars and garden, saving me the trouble of washing and watering, respectively! It’s about time to throw a few racks of ribs in the smoker and have friends over! Nuts. It’s also time I remember to get my rib recipe and some other barbecue recipes posted in the hobbies section on our forum, http://forum.makingherhappy.com.

Speaking of which, I’ve been posting a lot of helpful info for you single folks recently in the “Hot Tips: Dating” forum since noticing that nearly half the members are in fact single. We’re covering red flags, cell phone etiquette, and more, and I’m trying to add new content for single people at least every other day, so don’t miss out because you think it’s just for us old married fuddy-duddies. There’s something there for everyone.

I got a letter from a new subscriber I’d like to share with you, because he asks a very important question, and about as succinctly as possible. Meet Brad:

Hi David,

What does this “attraction” you talk about feel like to a woman?

Thanks,
Brad

I got another wonderful letter once from a female reader that goes a long way toward answering the question, the kind that really makes this job a pleasure, and we’ll start with that, because there’s nothing like going to the source when you need to know something. Meet Bethany:

Dear David

I hope this letter finds you and your family doing well this holiday season. As the seasons change and the temperature becomes colder that is when you really get to know a person when most of the time you are in close quarters during the cold weather. I guess for some this may seem like a death sentence but for a few of us lucky ones it is the best time of the year.

I wanted to share with you today something that happened to me just a couple of days ago and when I finally understood just how strong attraction can be and knew it was worth all the work we had to do to make it happen. My husband and I have been working really hard on making our marriage as close to perfect as one can hope for and with your book it finally seems that we have it all. I have never in my life loved being with anyone the way I do this man and yes I know he feels the same for me.

We both work hard, and we have six wonderful children to keep us busy at home so we try our best throughout the long days we put in we make time for each other. For instance this past Friday my husband and I meet at a local restaurant near his office to have lunch. We ate and talked and I loved just sitting there with him and looking into his eyes as he smiled at me when the conversation made reference to what we wanted to do later on that night at home. I could talk with him for hours and never be bored. I have never been so happy in my life but then the check came and it was time to leave and go our separate ways for the rest of the afternoon. I was really upset because I did not want to leave just yet but I knew we had to. I never said anything to him as he walked me to my car and kissed me and told me he would see me later.

In the car however driving back I became so upset I started to cry. At first I was not sure why I was upset, but then I knew why. I did not want to go back to work. I wanted Allen my husband to take me home and to spend the rest of the afternoon in bed with me. I was just so attracted to him I wanted to drop everything for that day and be with him. It did not matter to me that we both have jobs that if we are not on top of things we will miss major orders that leads to paydays for us. I should have just called him. I wouldn’t have had to say much for him to know something was wrong and he probably would have figured out what pretty fast because he’s gotten so good at reading me. But we both need to work because keeping six kids fed on what we make doesn’t leave a whole lot of room for play time.

What I am saying is that I am so attracted to this man (I know how you hate it when people say “in love”) I was willing to give up half of a day of work and maybe even my job just to be with him and spend time alone. I think about it every day that we are not together and I know we have to work but the attraction for him is so strong all I want is for him to have sex with me all the time to feel his body next to mine and his lips kissing me. I never thought that I could truly say I would kill for attraction but I know now that I could and would if anyone came between me and this man I love so much.

Thank you so much for making my marriage the one thing in this world that I want to keep for the rest of my life and giving me a real man one that is all I have ever dreamed of.

Bethany


You’re most welcome Bethany, and thank you very much for taking the time to write and tell me about it. People are always very eager to write or call someone to complain, but so seldom take the time to say “Thank you” or to tell someone that things went well for them. If we all took an extra minute or two out of our day to let those around us know that we appreciate the time they give us, the world would indeed be a happier place. Think about this…

Life is the most precious of all resources, and your own life is the most precious of the precious, at least if you are mentally and emotionally healthy, because not one second of it that passes can ever be replenished, and when someone thinks enough of you to give you some portion of their life, you owe them the appreciation due such a gift, a trade of your life for theirs. Indeed, respect the time of others as being a measure of their life, and make an effort to show up on time and conduct yourself in a way that does not waste the time and life of others.

Okay, I’m getting down off my stump now. So how would you describe the feelings Bethany is speaking of here? Rather “honeymoonesqe”? Somewhat unusual for two people who have been married long enough to have six kids? You’re quite right! It is unusual, but nowhere near impossible, nor abnormal. Being happy together in a good relationship is a natural state for two well-matched people to enjoy, especially when they can communicate well with each other and enjoy doing so. If you’re not there too, you’re missing out, but you can fix it. How?

Do what Allen and Bethany did! Jump over to http://www.makingherhappy.com and download your copy of “THE Man’s Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage,” because it will get you there if you just take advantage of the experience of the 118 couples who tested everything that went into the book. Life’s too short to spend it any way but happy, so get moving!

In the meantime, live well, be well, and have a wonderful day!
David Cunningham

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