Wednesday, June 24, 2009

What Happens When Women Don't Get What They Really Want in Relationships and Marriage

In case you might be thinking that everything at home, while mundane and boring, is really going okay, take a look at what may be happening behind your back if you failed to listen when you had the opportunity…

You might remember in the June 20, 2009 edition, my buddy “Rick” sent us something that one of the ladies on his dating site had sent him, which demonstrated perfectly how women want a real man. Well, he’s sent me another, and this one is equally revealing, as you will see:

Hey David,

Thank you so much for featuring my email in your newsletter. It's an honor and a privilege to help get the truth out.

Please accept the following as a symbol of my appreciation as well as education for your readers:

I had another woman look at my online profile. What makes this one different is that she's a not-so-happily MARRIED woman. Look at how she describes herself:

"I am a mother of two small children and a wife of 6 years. Hubby acts like he is not interested in me because he is always online when he is not at work. I enjoy reading, cooking, baking and spending time with my children. I also enjoy the few private times I have with hubby."

As bleak as this looks, this is a double feature. Now look at what she wants from a man (you may have to edit this!):

"I am looking for someone who will make me feel as if I am a woman and not just a mother and housewife. I would like to find someone who will make me blush and get all hot and wet at the same time. Someone who will help me find out what really turns me on and who is willing to quench the flames of a horny and over-sexed woman. I am at the age where hubby can not keep up with me and my demands...Can you?"

Looks like she wants an Alpha Male to me! David, this is a textbook example of what you said about how a woman feels, and what she'll do if she gets bored and loses her attraction. As you know all to well, this happens a lot more than it should. The overriding lesson here is the same in your daily newsletters: be a MAN, and learn how to satisfy your woman! If you don't you'll pay a heavy price down the road. This is about a lot more than just sex, this is your life! Make the most of it.

Thanks again, and keep spreading the truth.

Sincerely,

Rick


Any questions? I have a few! Starting with “Do you think this woman’s husband has any idea that she’s advertising on a public web site saying that she wants the attention of another man because he ignores her for his computer and can’t keep up sexually?

How many times do you think she tried to tell him it was coming to this and he either didn’t understand or didn’t take her seriously?

And when she succeeds in finding someone else and he finds out about it, who will he blame?

And then what will happen?

Gentlemen, every woman reading this today will vouch for every word I’m telling you. If you’re spending all your free time with your computer, your car, your job, your buddies, or anything else and she’s not getting any of it, she’s not happy. And if she’s not saying anything to you about it, she’s tired of being ignored and has given up. She’ll be looking soon if she isn’t already.

What’s that? You don’t ignore her? Well, if most of your time is spent without her, I beg to differ, but even if you don’t, she may be feeling ignored because she’s tried to tell you that something was missing and you didn’t get it.

No, she wouldn’t just come out and say, “Something’s missing and I’m not happy.” Women don’t do that. She would have ASKED, “Are you happy with the way things are between us?” or something along those lines, which for a woman is more of a statement than a question. And if you assumed it was only a question and just said, “yes,” without asking her if SHE was happy, you just shut her down and ignored her without even knowing it.

That’s one of a thousand pitfalls that can lead to affairs and divorce; a missed signal, a misunderstood look, phrase, or protocol, a question taken as a question instead of the statement made by asking the question, for example, are all very small things with a very big and very negative impact to a relationship or marriage.

But how would you know? Or her? Neither of you are born knowing that men and women use the same words to communicate but use them in entirely different ways with very different protocols. And there are not many people around who have figured this out, and of the few of us who have, very few of that number have ever written it down and offered it to the public. Of the few of those who exist today, and I’m talking about a scant handful, most offer a bunch of opinion and theory without having ever really tested their advice on a large scale.

So the information supply is small, the majority unreliable, and most people, especially men, don’t even know they need it. I recently read a statement by a professional counselor, directed at me, stating that he thought that deception was the basis of a good relationship, because in lying to his wife he had made up for her disrespecting him. Can you imagine?

I know some of you who frequent a particular anti-divorce web site have seen it, too. He’s the same one who says I can’t be an effective or competent counselor because I give SPECIFIC advice instead of the nebulous vagaries he and his peers use to run up a bill. I'll put my success record up against his or anybody else's any day. And yet our species continues to multiply. It’s just that the divorce rate continues to increase faster than the population size.

So let’s get back to you. Do you know what your wife is doing when she’s on the computer and you’re not around? Do you know what she’s doing when she’s out of the house and you’re not around? I know exactly what mine is doing at all times. She’s looking forward to being with me! And if you’ll ask any of my readers who haven’t found themselves faced with gross incompatibility problems and had to leave a bad marriage that couldn’t be fixed, you’ll find that they will give you the same answer.

So what can you divine from that? Two things. First, that my book will help you determine whether you are in the right or wrong marriage, and second, if you’re in the right one, it will help you make it better than it’s ever been and you’ll always know what your wife is doing every minute that she’s away from you, looking forward to the next time she’s with you, not looking for someone else to fill the void that you have left.

Where do you start? Start at
http://www.makingherhappy.com and download your copy of "THE Man's Guide to Great Relationships and Marriage." Read it. See where you’ve made mistakes and then take the information provided and fix them. And then watch what happens as you and your wife start looking forward to every minute you spend together. It’s a feeling like no other.

In the meantime, live well, be well, and have a wonderful day!
David Cunningham

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