Monday, April 24, 2006

How Do You Know If She's Faking an Orgasm?

How can you tell if she’s faking “the big O”? It's not foolproof, but it's far from impossible!

Good grief. I’ve been going over this issue in my head on and off all day, and still can’t believe I’m writing it, but I keep getting hammered with the question, so I’m going to answer, and then I’m going to tell you something a lot more important…

The question is simple. Meet Todd, one of the many newsletter readers who asked the question, and who did so in the fewest words while sounding intelligent:

Hi David,

How do I tell if and when my partner is faking her climax?

Thanks,
Todd


Todd’s a man of few but well-chosen words, isn’t he? To answer, there is no way to always tell with 100% certainty, but here are a couple pretty dependable bits that can help you figure it out.

First, if she appears to be screaming during the contractions, she’s either faking or grossly exaggerating. Physiologically, that’s as near an impossibility as being able to hold your eyes open when you sneeze, and for the same reason. It’s in the “wiring” of your nervous system. There are rare – and I do mean RARE – exceptions to this, according to what I have read in medically- and therapeutically-oriented books on the subject, but the exceptions are mentioned in the context of nerve damage, birth defects, and anomalies like having all your internal organs on the wrong side of your body. Like I said, RARE.

Along the same lines is another very telling sign, but in the opposite way. It is supposed to be near-impossible for a woman to experience any significant level of climax without her toes curling. No kidding. Now, if she knows about this, she can fake curling her toes, but if she’s bucking and thrusting and making all kinds of steamy animal noises and her toes aren’t curling, either she’s faking or she’s one of those RARE cases mentioned earlier. I have never personally observed one of those RARE cases, and I’ll say nothing about whether I should have seen one by now.

Now, don’t even think about asking me how you’re supposed to keep an eye on her toes while in the act. If I even try to answer that question the spam filters (annoying pieces of crap!) will be trapping 99% of this edition and few will ever see it. (Don’t get me going about spam filters. I finally found spam protection that works better than anything that uses filters – see http://www.mailvice.com/ if you’re interested.) Just use your imagination, get into a position, like “canine”-style that lets you see her feet, and don’t obsess over it. You shouldn’t be worried about it anyway. Why?

Because you ought to be doing it right and know it by the fact that your partner is acting like are the “King Daddy Pleasure God” by giving you sexy looks, being playful with you, etc. If you’re being the alpha male (not alpha dog! – see the archived article for the distinction!) and engaging in naughty play as you should be, especially in the way of slowly ramping up the action through the day as described in “How to Be Attractive to the Woman You Love,” you’re going to know, in no uncertain terms. A woman who’s happy in her bedroom makes it all too obvious. If you’re having to worry about whether she’s faking, you’d better be getting your butt over to http://www.makingherhappy.com/ and getting your copy of “How to Be Attractive to the Woman You Love” before she gets bored and you end up either celibate or cuckold. You know as well as I do that if Mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy, and if Mama IS happy, EVERYBODY’S HAPPY, and this is your best shot at making that happen, so get busy!

In the meantime, live well, be well, and have a wonderful day!
David Cunningham

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